Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Teaching your Pennsylvania Teen to Drive, Part 2: Parking Lot Lessons

(This is a post originally written for FamilyFuninPA.com. The original can be found HERE.)

We are in the process of teaching our 16-year-old son to drive, and I'm sharing our experiences and some tips, just in case you have never been through this exciting and scary stage of parenting.  Part 1 can be found here.

So, your teenager has turned 16 and has successfully obtained their Pennsylvania Learner’s Permit. It’s time to hit the road! Buckle up, parents, you are in for a wild ride!

Step 1: Before you do anything else, make sure your Xanax prescription is full…. Kidding! That’s just a joke! I swear! But I am not kidding when I say, you DO want to get your brain into a calm, zen-like state before putting your child behind the steering wheel. Deep breaths, meditation, yoga, whatever works for you…

Tip #1: No matter how much the DMV worker teases your child that they should drive you home immediately after passing their permit knowledge test (seriously, DMV guy? What was up with that?), this is NOT a good idea!

Tip #2: No matter how your child tries to convince you that they will have no problem with driving because they have driven go-karts or golf carts and they are really great at Grand Theft Auto — trust me, they are CLUELESS.

For the first driving lesson, you should go to a large, empty parking lot, perhaps at a school or a church. When your teen gets into the driver’s seat for the first time, you will have to teach them where everything is. Everything. Don’t make any assumptions based on the fact that they have been observing your driving for 16 years; they will not know where the gear shift is, the turn signals, the windshield wipers… nothing. Start with that.

Have them adjust the mirrors — they’ve been taught in their drivers’ ed class that there is a “new” way to adjust the mirrors, which includes leaning their head against the driver’s side window and making sure they can only see a tiny bit of the car in the driver’s side mirror, and then leaning toward the middle of the car and making sure they can only see a little bit of the passenger side of the car in the passenger side mirror.

During this first lesson, you will also want to have them practice turning the car off and on. Again, it’s easy for us to assume they will know how to do that, but that is not necessarily true. When the car is running, have them practice moving their foot from the gas to the brake and back again. So basic, right? But it goes against their instincts to use only one foot for both things, and they really need to get the feel for where each thing is.

Next, make sure their foot is firmly planted on the brake, then have them switch gears into Drive. (By the way, this is all assuming you are not driving a stick shift. If you are, I can’t help you with that one! Good luck to you.) Make sure there is a nice straight path in front of you, and have your child drive straight ahead to a pre-designated stopping point. I’m talking just 20-30 yards ahead. This is just to help them get the feel for how hard to press on the gas and the brake. They will drive very, very slowly and nervously at first and the stops may be very jerky until they get the feel for it. Just remain calm and be very positive about how they are doing.

They’ll soon be ready to make gradual turns around the parking lot. Be prepared for the fact that they will have no concept of when to start turning and where the passenger side of the car is in relation to the right side of the “road.” You may take some REALLY wide turns for awhile and the speeds will be erratic. This is where that Xanax might come in handy. Haha, I’m KIDDING!! I swear! This part is a piece of cake. You are in an empty parking lot! How much damage can they do? Just continue to breathe deeply and calmly praise their efforts. Take a few laps in different directions, and after they feel more confident in turning, starting & stopping, you can call it a day. You’ll have 1/2 hour to record in the Supervised Driving Log; only 64-1/2 more to go!

I would recommend spending a few more lessons in the parking lot. Your child needs to build up their confidence and get more of a feel for how the car handles, and you need to practice getting into your zen-like mental state. Because it's a whole 'nother ball game when they get out on the streets with other cars. But we'll save that conversation for another day...

Click here for Part 3: Hitting the Road.

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